Clive's Theory of Distractability

In my week "off" following ChaLEAN Extreme, I was feeling fat and sluggish, so I did some serious treadmill time.

I've never had huge success with the treadmill. Nevertheless, I own one now and use it occasionally. My problem is that since I decide when to start/stop, and what pace to go, I end up wimping out before I actually get a good workout. I've slowly started to pick up on something, though...

When I first began using the treadmill, I would watch a tiny TV, which didn't have a built-in guide, so I would have to guess what was on, and channel surf until I found something even remotely interesting. This was usually never, especially on Wednesdays when it was Tyler Perry's Wednesday nights with Tyler Perry on TBS. Treadmill-time was mostly torture and I couldn't wait to be finished.

More recently (since ownership of my own treadmill), I've had the opportunity to watch a larger, nicer TV with a DVR, so I could always record my own shows, and more-frequently find something I'd like to watch. Still, commercials proved problematic. I'd quickly come back to the realization that, dammit, I was on a treadmill and I'd either have to try to switch stations or fast-forward. I wanted something that I could escape into a little deeper.

Last week, I had a break-through... an awesome discovery, which I call "Clive's Theory of Distractability." C-ToD states:

"The greater extent to which one can distract one's self whilst exercising, the greater the resulting caloric burn."

My optimal element of distractability? Video games. It seems so obvious now that I can't believe I didn't think of it earlier. I get to choose the entertainment, so I'm not at the mercy of 3rd-party programing, and best of all, THERE ARE NO COMMERCIALS. I played all sorts of "New Super Mario Bros Wii" as well as emulated old-skool games, but, of course, you can pick your faves. Anything that doesn't involve substantial wii-mote pointing or movement works, otherwise your exercise might confuse the poor wii-mote. Also, I found it much easier to crank the treadmill up to a steep grade (20%) and just walk it instead of trying to run or jog.


Using this method, I was EASILY able to do away with 700 to 1000 calories/night. I did, however, stumble upon a corollary to C-ToD...

C-ToD Corollary 1: "Treadmill distraction can lead to over-use, and result in bruised feet."

Yes. Bruised feet. I have never - EVER - in my life even heard of bruised feet, much less had them... and, DAMN, do they hurt. If you happen to use your feet at all (which I'm guessing is 99.99% of the people who own treadmills) you're constantly stepping on your bruises, which not only KILLS, but it slows the healing process.

Regardless, I HIGHLY recommend the video game application of C-ToD to any nerd having trouble exercising. Even if you don't own a treadmill, I could see bringing a DS to the gym particularly successful. (BTW, is it bad that I'm tempted to buy a 3DS for the sake of playing "Mario Land 3D" only?)

So what's your optimal element of distraction? Do you have any further corollaries to the C-ToD?

Until next time, n3rds!

-Clive

ChaLEAN Extreme, Month 3 (LEAN Phase) in Review

(Check out the Month 1 (BURN Phase) Review)
(Check out the Month 2 (PUSH Phase) Review)

So here it is! Month 3 of ChaLEAN Extreme. Were there any big surprises? Well, yes and no. The format was the same (three days of weight training, one day of Cardio + Abs, and one day of Cardio + yoga) but the difficulty was ramped up significantly. Like. A lot.

For one, the weight training portions REALLY focused on the arms. Sure, there were some compound movements (arms and legs) but each routine made sure to hit your arms in some way. And there were push-ups. Lots of push-ups. Push-ups on their own don't really bother me. But when you try to do them ridiculously slow after already fatiguing your arms with other routines...It's a challenge. But challenge is good! We want challenge. Similarly to Insanity, "failure" is success.

Like in Month 1, each routine is back to 12 reps, but Chalene really wants you to fail anytime after 10 reps. And remember in Month 2's review, when I complained about the "Extreme" reps at the end of the last few routines? Well, you'll be doing these extra slow, extra painful bonus reps at the end of EVERY routine in Month 3.

The weight training isn't the only thing that's gotten an increase in difficulty this month. The mid-week Cardio routine (which, if you remember from Month 1's review, has some weights intermixed throughout the workout) is very challenging. I've been using the resistance bands with ChaLEAN Extreme, and those things make this exercise really tough. Resistance bands, unlike free weights, increase in resistance the further you extend them. It just so happens that there are a LOT of long-extension routines in this workout. I've been starting out with the red (~12lb) band, and on occasion switching down to the green (~8lb) band. Keep in mind, that at a 3x stretch, the "~12lb" band is closer to 20lbs, and if you're using the band with both ends in one hand, multiply that by two again...

Donna (60 years old) put me to shame several times during ChaLEAN Extreme.

The end-of-week Cardio routine was also a lot tougher than previous months, and after the first time doing it, my legs KILLED the next day. (Apparently those muscles had yet to be used throughout ChaLEAN Extreme?)

Once again, I replaced the "pseudo-yoga" with an additional ab routine. This one was called "I've Got Abs," but in all honestly, it was probably on-par, if not easier than the previous month's ab routine. Nevertheless, it's important to switch up your routines so your body doesn't get accustomed to a certain regimen and plateau.

So, overall, what did I think?

I think ChaLEAN Extreme is a great introduction to weight training. While I definitely feel more shapely and toned, I probably didn't get the most out of the routine due to personal hiccups and holiday distractions. It's a challenging time of year to maintain a workout regimen. As exercise is apt to do, ChaLEAN Extreme really started to drive my hunger. That's a problem when Thanksgiving leftovers and Christmas cookies are lying around. The advantage of doing a cardio routine is that you burn more of those calories during your workouts. With weight training, you just get hungry but don't burn as much. (That was my experience, anyway.) That means you need to be incredibly careful about what you're putting in to your body. That's my weakness. As I've mentioned at least once, I love food. Especially Chipotle. Moving on.

The other thing is that the regimen is clearly aimed at women. I mean, they have a token male (like many regimens do) but it seemed like the entire time Chalene was talking about fitting into your jeans or bikini, or impressing the boys at your high school reunion. Her chatter doesn't really bother me much, but I could see how it could be annoying to some.

Overall, this is a great workout for those looking for something that isn't too intense, but will keep you working out. If you're curious about weight training, I'd definitely give it a go. If you don't have free weights and don't want to spend a lot of money, try those resistance bands - they're cheap and travel-friendly!

That's all for now... Until next time, nerds!

-Clive