I'm not a copy-(lol)cat...

I recently stumbled across nerdfitness.com and what can I say? It's a fantastic site. In fact, it's everything I had hoped this site would become. I should've probably expected that some other brilliant nerd would beat me to the punch.


Now, I as much as I would like to pretend the aforementioned site doesn't exist, I have to do the right thing and try to openly coexist with nerdfitness and in the meantime acknowledge their vast superiority.


In my defense, however, this blog is still a pupa in a state of metamorphosis, much like my journey and insight into the world of health & fitness. I'll no doubt glean some information from nerdfitness, which will invariably find its way into these pages, but I will absolutely strive for unique articles, a unique voice, and a unique audience who will love me despite not being the ORIGINAL fit nerd. 8-)


And now, my favorite lolcat of the week:

Let's see Mr. Nerdfitness do THAT!


-Clive

P90X: I still have a pulse (First Impressions)

Heya, n3rds!


As was my intent following ChaLEAN Extreme, I started P90X last week.

First impressions: For weights, it's very challenging. For Cardio, it not the hardest workout DVD on the market.


The thing about weights, though, is that you have to decide what weights to (try to) lift. If you don't challenge yourself, you don't get results. With Cardio, it's a lot easier to say, "just keep moving, just keep moving, just keep moving..." and only stop when you're actually going to collapse.


In other news, I need to clean up my diet. I "accidentally" ate a lot of chips last night. And it was pretty much right before I went to bed.


Fail


-Clive

Six Sigma Fitness: Goals (Define)

It recently occurred to me that I don't have very well-definited fitness goals. I mean, I started this blog to "keep myself accountable," but that alone is not enough. What am I doing? Just working out?

-- The importance of setting goals: --

"In absence of clearly defined goals, we become strangely loyal to performing daily acts of trivia." - Unknown

Recently, I've been working out without a purpose. That's a pretty bad idea. Most people require a measure of success to keep themselves motivated to achieve... otherwise, why the hell would you work out?

Pfft, let me stop you fitnophiles before you even start... I'm talking to the people who, like me, DON'T enjoy working out, who DON'T thrive off the endorphin rush, and have to practically coerce themselves into doing anything that remotely resembles physical activity. Some of us need a reason to interrupt our otherwise comfortable existence to sweat, ache, and stink. Sounds baffling, I know...

-- What makes a good goal? --


I recently took a set of Six Sigma classes. (Six Sigma is essentially a methodology for thorough problem-solving, which is only vaguely applicable to actual day-to-day work, but that's another story.)

Six Sigma puts substantial emphasis on goal-setting, using the "S.M.A.R.T." mnemonic:

S - Specific: addresses the "Who, What, Where, Why, Which"
M - Measureable: establishes concrete criteria for measuring progress
A - Attainable: ensures that your goal is within reach

R - Relevant: ensures that pursuing this goal is a worthwhile allocation of resources

T - Time-bound: sets a time-frame to establish a sense of urgency and accountability

Is anyone else not *that* surprised there's a Six Sigma lolcat?

 -- I'll be the guinea pig... --


I'll use myself as an example. I know I have the potential for abs, so I could make that my goal - it's Attainable, but neither Specific nor Measurable. I know I have to get rid of that old "stubborn belly fat" but there are a million different goals I could set to try to tackle that. What makes the most sense?


Strictly speaking, I want to reduce inches around my waist, but that's really only a partial solution (not Relevant). I want to lose fat all over. One commonly-used metric is BMI (Body-Mass Index). When I was "obese" (i.e. had a lot of fat to lose), it was an excellent metric to measure my progress. The problem with using BMI now is that not all mass is created equal. To get abs, you need muscle mass and not fat mass. You need a low BF% (Body-Fat Percentage).


Now, even after two rounds of Insanity, ChaLEAN Extreme, and a few other random regimens here and there, I'm still between 16 and 18% (BF% is really tough to calculate without a caliper, but there are decent - albeit inconsistent - tape-measure calculation methods out there). 16 - 18% isn't BAD... in fact, it's comfortably in the "Average" range, but after some research, it seems that most men start to see abs around the 10%-mark. Let's give this a shot:

"I want increase ab-visibility by reaching a BF% of 10%."

Close, but I'm still missing something... It's not Time-bound. I want to set a reasonable date to achieve this goal, but not too relaxed so as to reduce the sense of urgency. June 1st, 2012 is not only reasonable, but Relevant (swim-suit season). Now we have it:

"I want increase ab-visibility by reaching a BF% of 10% by June 1st, 2012."

I think that's a mighty-fine goal, and I hearby adopt it as my own.

Ah yes... There's one more ridiculously important step in this process: Disclosure. Unless you make your goals known beyond the boundaries of your own cranium, you can start to lose accountability and find ways to bend the rules so I can escape the sweat, ache, and stink. -- I mean "you." YOU would do that, not me...

<.<
  o

When you publicly put yourself on the line, the people you tell become your involuntary support group. Whether they cheer you on or not (they probably won't) you'll still be obligated to follow through.

-- May the Force Be With You --

 So now it's your turn. Where are you today and where do you want to be? Do you want to lose weight? Are you looking for a little more muscle definition? Maybe you just want to be able to run a mile without stopping, or best your friends in a pull-up competition?

Figure out what your goals are. Be Specific. Make sure it's Measurable. Despite your wild aspirations, make sure it's Attainable and Relevant. Set a Timeline to keep yourself accountable, and lastly, TELL EVERYONE YOU KNOW.

-Clive

(More on S.M.A.R.T. goals from Wikipedia.)

Clive's Theory of Distractability

In my week "off" following ChaLEAN Extreme, I was feeling fat and sluggish, so I did some serious treadmill time.

I've never had huge success with the treadmill. Nevertheless, I own one now and use it occasionally. My problem is that since I decide when to start/stop, and what pace to go, I end up wimping out before I actually get a good workout. I've slowly started to pick up on something, though...

When I first began using the treadmill, I would watch a tiny TV, which didn't have a built-in guide, so I would have to guess what was on, and channel surf until I found something even remotely interesting. This was usually never, especially on Wednesdays when it was Tyler Perry's Wednesday nights with Tyler Perry on TBS. Treadmill-time was mostly torture and I couldn't wait to be finished.

More recently (since ownership of my own treadmill), I've had the opportunity to watch a larger, nicer TV with a DVR, so I could always record my own shows, and more-frequently find something I'd like to watch. Still, commercials proved problematic. I'd quickly come back to the realization that, dammit, I was on a treadmill and I'd either have to try to switch stations or fast-forward. I wanted something that I could escape into a little deeper.

Last week, I had a break-through... an awesome discovery, which I call "Clive's Theory of Distractability." C-ToD states:

"The greater extent to which one can distract one's self whilst exercising, the greater the resulting caloric burn."

My optimal element of distractability? Video games. It seems so obvious now that I can't believe I didn't think of it earlier. I get to choose the entertainment, so I'm not at the mercy of 3rd-party programing, and best of all, THERE ARE NO COMMERCIALS. I played all sorts of "New Super Mario Bros Wii" as well as emulated old-skool games, but, of course, you can pick your faves. Anything that doesn't involve substantial wii-mote pointing or movement works, otherwise your exercise might confuse the poor wii-mote. Also, I found it much easier to crank the treadmill up to a steep grade (20%) and just walk it instead of trying to run or jog.


Using this method, I was EASILY able to do away with 700 to 1000 calories/night. I did, however, stumble upon a corollary to C-ToD...

C-ToD Corollary 1: "Treadmill distraction can lead to over-use, and result in bruised feet."

Yes. Bruised feet. I have never - EVER - in my life even heard of bruised feet, much less had them... and, DAMN, do they hurt. If you happen to use your feet at all (which I'm guessing is 99.99% of the people who own treadmills) you're constantly stepping on your bruises, which not only KILLS, but it slows the healing process.

Regardless, I HIGHLY recommend the video game application of C-ToD to any nerd having trouble exercising. Even if you don't own a treadmill, I could see bringing a DS to the gym particularly successful. (BTW, is it bad that I'm tempted to buy a 3DS for the sake of playing "Mario Land 3D" only?)

So what's your optimal element of distraction? Do you have any further corollaries to the C-ToD?

Until next time, n3rds!

-Clive

ChaLEAN Extreme, Month 3 (LEAN Phase) in Review

(Check out the Month 1 (BURN Phase) Review)
(Check out the Month 2 (PUSH Phase) Review)

So here it is! Month 3 of ChaLEAN Extreme. Were there any big surprises? Well, yes and no. The format was the same (three days of weight training, one day of Cardio + Abs, and one day of Cardio + yoga) but the difficulty was ramped up significantly. Like. A lot.

For one, the weight training portions REALLY focused on the arms. Sure, there were some compound movements (arms and legs) but each routine made sure to hit your arms in some way. And there were push-ups. Lots of push-ups. Push-ups on their own don't really bother me. But when you try to do them ridiculously slow after already fatiguing your arms with other routines...It's a challenge. But challenge is good! We want challenge. Similarly to Insanity, "failure" is success.

Like in Month 1, each routine is back to 12 reps, but Chalene really wants you to fail anytime after 10 reps. And remember in Month 2's review, when I complained about the "Extreme" reps at the end of the last few routines? Well, you'll be doing these extra slow, extra painful bonus reps at the end of EVERY routine in Month 3.

The weight training isn't the only thing that's gotten an increase in difficulty this month. The mid-week Cardio routine (which, if you remember from Month 1's review, has some weights intermixed throughout the workout) is very challenging. I've been using the resistance bands with ChaLEAN Extreme, and those things make this exercise really tough. Resistance bands, unlike free weights, increase in resistance the further you extend them. It just so happens that there are a LOT of long-extension routines in this workout. I've been starting out with the red (~12lb) band, and on occasion switching down to the green (~8lb) band. Keep in mind, that at a 3x stretch, the "~12lb" band is closer to 20lbs, and if you're using the band with both ends in one hand, multiply that by two again...

Donna (60 years old) put me to shame several times during ChaLEAN Extreme.

The end-of-week Cardio routine was also a lot tougher than previous months, and after the first time doing it, my legs KILLED the next day. (Apparently those muscles had yet to be used throughout ChaLEAN Extreme?)

Once again, I replaced the "pseudo-yoga" with an additional ab routine. This one was called "I've Got Abs," but in all honestly, it was probably on-par, if not easier than the previous month's ab routine. Nevertheless, it's important to switch up your routines so your body doesn't get accustomed to a certain regimen and plateau.

So, overall, what did I think?

I think ChaLEAN Extreme is a great introduction to weight training. While I definitely feel more shapely and toned, I probably didn't get the most out of the routine due to personal hiccups and holiday distractions. It's a challenging time of year to maintain a workout regimen. As exercise is apt to do, ChaLEAN Extreme really started to drive my hunger. That's a problem when Thanksgiving leftovers and Christmas cookies are lying around. The advantage of doing a cardio routine is that you burn more of those calories during your workouts. With weight training, you just get hungry but don't burn as much. (That was my experience, anyway.) That means you need to be incredibly careful about what you're putting in to your body. That's my weakness. As I've mentioned at least once, I love food. Especially Chipotle. Moving on.

The other thing is that the regimen is clearly aimed at women. I mean, they have a token male (like many regimens do) but it seemed like the entire time Chalene was talking about fitting into your jeans or bikini, or impressing the boys at your high school reunion. Her chatter doesn't really bother me much, but I could see how it could be annoying to some.

Overall, this is a great workout for those looking for something that isn't too intense, but will keep you working out. If you're curious about weight training, I'd definitely give it a go. If you don't have free weights and don't want to spend a lot of money, try those resistance bands - they're cheap and travel-friendly!

That's all for now... Until next time, nerds!

-Clive